i still believe in you and me until the end of time

this may well be the last ever post i create using blogspot - the lure of being able to blog easily on the go on my phone is becoming something hard to resist. the added fact that the majority of blogs i read aren't on this site and that i can import all my previous entries onto a wordpress account, should i decide to get one, are other things pushing me towards the app friendly world of wordpress.

happy valentines day.

fact # 76
not a red rose or a satin heart - i give you an onion. it is a moon wrapped in brown paper. it promises light like the careful undressing of love. here - it will blind you with tears like a lover. it will make your reflection a wobbling photo of grief. i am trying to be truthful. not a cute card or a kissogram - i give you an onion. its fierce kiss will stay on your lips, possessive and faithful as we are, for as long as we are.

" he turns to me, says 'i've got to tell you how i feel - if god could make the perfect girl for me it would be you' "

on wednesday i'm guessing i fell asleep around two am, thursday around one thirty following an eventful trip to brixton academy with alex to see lostprophets and last night around three o clock - i was definitely surprised to find myself up and in the shower at eight o clock on the first morning of my holiday. in a way i am proud of this feat; i am convinced, however, that i must have trudged in an oh-so-attractive caveman style necessary to move me from the warmth of my nest to the shower next door.

as much as i love new york i don't think i will ever be able to get london out of my system, today was spent around the general vicinity of regents street and oxford circus. tomorow -the joy of valentines day- will be spent with emily around spitalfield and exchanging a gorgeous dress i got today for a smaller size.

forgive my sceptic attitude regarding valentines day, but i've never been a real advocate of the day. why is it, that on the fourteenth of february, people feel the urgent need to prove how they feel about one another? why this day, opposed to any other? surely the emphasis should be put into making the effort of showing your other half that you care about them the phenomenal amount you do on every single day of the year? i'm not suggesting countless red roses every day of the week - let's face it. it's a waste of money and they die.


fact # 75
cupid is blind.
replace his arrow with a massive gun and suddenly he's not so cute anymore.

sardines

two summers ago in the uv jets of a swiss, august sunshine, i was lucky enough to be at the side of lake oeschinensee. having just googled how you spell it, a number of pictures sprung up reminding me how beautiful it was. in the gravel that littered the sides of the phenomenally cold glacier waters, max found an old rusty key. i was fascinated, what did it open? who did it belong to? how long had it been there? when it was time to leave, i pushed the key into a compartment in my bag for safe keeping.

it turns out the safe keeping was so safe, that i've only just found it.... but it's just the same as it ever was, around five cm long with a perfect oval segment to accompany the imperfect severed end where the actual key part  would have been. i realise now that there had never been a key part to it, as it's probably the key to an old sardine tin. yet despite this new found knowledge of it 'only being the key to a sardine tin', the appeal and mystery of max's amazing find was not lost.

sure. it's just a key to a picnic lunch some swiss people had on the identical spot that we happened to sit in a very long time ago - but as alan bennet once said 'life is like a box of sardines - we are all looking for the key'. well i've found my sardine key - it's definitely not the key to my entire life (for that would surely mean a short life), but it's allowed me to refind a lot of my memories of that trip and remember just how happy i was that summer.

i plan on keeping this old, rusted piece of junk for the rest of my life.


fact # 74
that week was one of the best of my life

a succession of images, thoughts, sounds, or emotions

it worries me how i can walk all the way home from school and have no recollection of anything past the really frustrating selsdon park drive-way where mothers who have no idea how to drive insist on parking, resulting in them skipping the queue in sainsbury's, but simultaneously causing chaos. one minute i was avoiding angry women clutching the steering wheel of their silver 4x4 as if no tomorrow, the next my gravel was crunching under my feet. having been entrapped within my dream-world yet managing to cross two main roads as well as navigate the pinnacle of death where downsway meets purley oaks is something which will remain as perturbing as impressive for quite sometime - or at least until i forget.

fact # 73
my hair is getting seriously long for me - i'm pretty sure this is the longest it's ever been.

nesting

i didn't think the amount of money i currently posess could reach a more critical level than the state it was in last weekend - yesterday proved me wrong. a lovely shopping day with amelia was marred by the sheer volume of gorgeous things i spied but couldn't get due to the significant lack of funding. why is it whenever you've got zero in the bank do you always come across the nicest things?!

fajitas at daniels followed my lovely day - not quite the drunken mexican fiesta involving shenanigans with fire as shown on skins... but still great.

fact # 72
there are two pigeons very much in love that live in the sussex road railway bridge.

many of horror

for the first couple of months, the adverts on spotify really didn't bother me at all - but i have now heard the 'i started with maths / science at school' so much that everytime it comes on i'm sorely tempted to punch the laptop. don't get me wrong, i completely understand the need for adverts on spotify to make it legal, but for gods sake. get some new ones once in a while!

more dissection was involved in biology - today a whole sheeps heart. it was phenomenal, the smell and clots however weren't so lovely. despite having washed my hands around seven times since four o clock the tang of old blood is still there... hopefully a bath with the newest lush bath bomb should remedy the situation.

fact # 71
when we collide we come together, if we don't we'll always be apart.

this is the 10:09 service calling at east croydon, clapham junction and london victoria.

a shopping trip in london was just what i needed - minus the idiots that seemed to simultaneously encircle and follow me at all times. for reasons unknown i tackled topshop as well as urban outfitters on a saturday afternoon - both experiences were as diabolical as i predicted them to be. don't get me wrong, i like the majority of topshop clothes (the same, can unfortunately not be said for urban outfitters anymore), but the sheer volume of people who push themselves into the stuffy red-hot building that smells of school dinners ever since the inclusion of eat to do nothing but pick up clothes on rails, look at them and then not even buy anything is near on ridiculous. why is it, that with such a huge range of clothes on offer do the majority of topshop shoppers all look the same?

on a lighter note, shopping experiences in all saints and selfridges were unsurprisingly far better, and toast remains the king of all toasted paninis.

fact # 70
i have progressed from russian navy to italian love affair. i hate myself for saying this, but the latter is much more practical. i have never before considered myself to be the practical sort until now.